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Motors, Exhaust Fumes, and Environmental Pollution

Mankind's addiction to internal combustion engines

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A terrible waste of gasoline

Gasoline engines are shameless machines. They're loud, dirty, and they stink. They burn non-renewable fossil fuels and poison our air with carcinogenic exhaust fumes. Using a motorised vehicle or tool is a personal choice, but everybody suffers the consequences: health risks, a contaminated environment, and catastrophic climate change.

While diesel and petrol engines at least perform useful work in transportation and industry, many other uses are not as reasonably justifiable. Many people care more about personal comfort than environmental concerns. They'd rather sweep the autumn leaves using a leafblower than a broom. They might find the loud engine noise and reeking clouds of exhaust gas a bit annoying, but can put up with them. The severe and lasting impact on the environment, on the other hand, is much more distant and abstract. They don't see or feel that the pollutants they blow into the air will contaminate the atmosphere for centuries. That unpleasant thought is easily brushed aside.

A young man holding a yellow two-stroke string trimmer. The exhaust outlet is pointed at the camera, with a faint blue haze pouring out of it.
Warming up the engine of a two-stroke weed eater (string trimmer). Excessive amounts of noise and air pollution for a miniscule amount of work facilitation. (Video)

But combustion engines are also used even more frivolously. In motorsports, for instance, gasoline is being burned just for fun. There's no longer any practical benefit to weigh the pollution up against. Motorsports athletes drive around in circles for amusement and competition, while their "sports equipment" poisons the air with noxious exhaust fumes. The racers and spectators treat themselves to a fun day out, at the expense of the environment.

You might consider that to be an irresponsible and reckless waste of gasoline, maybe even despicable and morally reprehensible. Even so, you can't protect yourself from the consequences. Nature doesn't care about fairness or who's responsible, and pollution doesn't observe borders. All of us breathe the same air, but the decision to poison it with exhaust fumes for their personal pleasure is made by the racers alone. They owe nobody an explanation or any accountability for casually destroying our basis of life.

Female motocross racers at the starting gate. A thick plume of two-stroke exhaust gas shoots out of the tailpipe of one of the dirtbikes.
Start of a motocross race. A few riders and their bikes pollute the breathing air of all of us. The race is half an hour of fun and thrills, but the fumes will plague the environment for centuries. (Video)

Abgase.org addresses the inconsiderate and aimless use of internal combustion engines, as well as the people who have no qualms about ravaging our environment for their personal comfort or amusement. They go go-kart racing with friends, enjoy a jetski ride on their seaside vacation, mow their lawn with a string trimmer, or charge their phone with a gas-powered generator when out camping. Nobody can deny them the right to beef up their hobbies and pastimes by adding a few motors and burning plenty of fuel, but even those who disapprove of this wastefulness suffer the consequences. We can't protect ourselves against the toxic fumes that pour out of the tailpipes and fill our lungs.

Is this the pinnacle of human progress?

Without a doubt, internal combustion engines are one of the most impressive human inventions and a masterpiece of engineering. Mass production of cars with gasoline engines in the early 20ᵗʰ century caused the demand for the previously unpopular fuel to skyrocket. The discovery of extremely rich oil fields and new refining processes quickly led to gasoline becoming the most abundant, practical, affordable, and efficient energy source.

A motocross rider filling the gas tank of his two-stroke dirtbike with premix.
It all starts with this: gasoline (or petrol). A clear, innocuous-looking liquid which, nonetheless, has devastating effects on our health and the environment. (Video)

But combustion engines weren't just a replacement for coal and steam in industry and transportation. Because they were so cheap to run, inventors came up with countless ideas on what else they could be used for. It was obvious that the direct control over their raw power also made them incredibly fun to use. The reaction to opening the throttle is immediate: a loud revving noise, an aggressive rumble, a plume of smoke from the exhaust. It almost seems as if these machines were always predestined to be used for fun and sport.

Mankind's inventive spirit was unleashed. We discovered that almost anything could be made more exciting by strapping an engine to it. We've sealed them up to use them in watercraft, made them smaller to build vehicles for children, built them lighter so we could carry them as a backpack for yard work, attached alternators so we could generate electricity with them, and tweaked their fuels to make them run well even at freezing temperatures. Almost no area of life, no part of the planet, no human activity hasn't been transformed by the introduction of the combustion engine. It has shaped our world and our life.

Today, an estimated 200 million combustion engines are manufactured per year, and an estimated two billion of them are currently in existence around the world. Every child knows what a gasoline engine is, what it sounds and smells like. Teenagers can hardly wait until they're old enough to get their own car or motor scooter. Petrol engines are everywhere. They're one of the most successful inventions in history, and one of humanity's most sought after goods.

But engines don't just fascinate us because of their technological sophistication. They also appeal to our primal senses because, unlike any other machine, they feel almost alive. We hear the engine putter, feel the heat it gives off and the eager vibration of the firing cylinders. It almost seems to be a living, breathing creature—because it is breathing, just the same as us, inhaling fresh, oxygen-rich air and breathing it back out when it's used up. With every twist or pull of the throttle, the engine screams out fiercely, shooting out another cloud of exhaust. No other machine feels so vivid, vigorous, and vibrant.

Regardless of what they're used for: with their purring and rumbling, the unmistakeable, piercing scent of burnt oil and gasoline, and the thick, blue fumes pouring out of the exhaust pipe, running engines in and of themselves are exciting, enchanting, and appealing on a deeply human level. Could this be why we're so obsessed with them, despite the fact that they're destroying the very natural foundations that sustain us?

A view from behind a go-kart race driver in a black racing suit. The go-kart blows out a thick, blue cloud of exhaust gas.
Photo by Takashi Azuma (Azuma303), licensed under CC BY-NC 2.0.

A visual trip through the diversity of air pollution

A planet drowning in fumes

Gasoline is being burned everywhere and all the time, by young and old, rich and poor, and for any reason imaginable. Whether on land, at sea, or in the air; whether at work, in sports, or just for fun; from the big city to deep within the rainforest, the world is teeming with combustion engines. Their deadly exhaust fumes are a constant companion of human civilisation.

These photos show just a tiny selection of the various motorised tools and vehicles with which we humans, for practical purposes or to amuse ourselves, poison the air we breathe.

The Abgase.org photo archives contain hundreds of thousands of pictures, a testimony of humanity's reckless contamination and destruction of nature. A public gallery will be constantly expanded with selected photos from the collection, some of the most egregious and senseless examples of man-made pollution ever captured on camera.

How humanity fell in love with petrol culture

Today, motors permeate all social classes and age groups. Since the invention of the combustion engine, countless types of motorised leisure activities and motorsports have emerged for people to enjoy themselves with, so long as they manage to silence their guilty conscience. From karting and motocross to jetskis, snowmobiles, skill challenges or soccer on motorcycles, to swimming aids and remote-controlled cars with petrol engines, there's something for every taste and opportunity.

With mopeds and motor scooters, the market even started directly targetting young people. In Europe in particular, millions of teenage boys and girls experienced their first sense of true freedom and mobility on one of the incredibly popular two-stroke scooters. The scooters took them to school, to meet friends, on a night out, or just a joyride. Most allowance money was earmarked for filling up the tank.

A motorcycle helmet was an essential possession for any teenager, if only to be able to ride pillion. The helmet was also a status symbol, it was proudly carried across the schoolyard and into the classroom. When school was out, dozens of pupils would begin warming up their scooters for the ride home. The many small-bore engines would be buzzing like an aggressive beehive and, like every day, the schoolyard would disappear in a blue fog of stifling two-stroke exhaust fumes for a few minutes. Students who were still stuck with using their muscle power instead of gasoline glanced over at the commotion with envy as they unlocked their bicycles.

The rusty exhaust pipe of a two-stroke motor scooter.
Tailpipe of a two-stroke motor scooter. For countless teenagers, these were the first vehicles that turned them into active contributors to air pollution.

Motorsports and their aesthetics also started taking hold in society at large. Professional race drivers became major celebrities, their racing gear considered stylish and appealing. Posters of Formula One drivers in their race suits went up on the walls of kids' bedrooms. Combining the elegant engineering of high-performance race engines with the impressive skill and physical performance of the athletes, motorsports were seen as by far the most modern and timely kinds of sport. Even though society grew increasingly aware of environmental concerns, motorsports culture had reached mass popularity and acceptance.

In addition, motorsports also kept becoming more affordable, gradually expanding from the professional leagues down into amateur and leisure sports. More and more people wanted to have some fun with motors in their spare time, and the market started meeting the demand. Rental kart racing tracks opened in most mid-sized towns, and the most popular vacation activities included jetski rides, snowmobile tours, and motor scooter rentals.

Low-threshold motorsports such as motocross became popular, grassroots sports open to all. Open races were held everywhere, and local clubs gave everybody a chance to try out the sport. Trial sessions for children started being offered, giving even the youngest a chance to discover and join the exciting world of gas-powered motorsports.

A young girl preparing to ride motocross.
Motorsports teach children from a young age that it's perfectly normal and acceptable to burn gasoline for fun. Kids growing up in this setting aren't likely to end up joining 'Fridays for Future'.

Over time, many varied subcultures have formed around the recreational use of gasoline engines. Taken together, I call them petrol culture, or gasoline culture in American terms. Others have used the term thrillcraft. Industries emerged around motorised devices and vehicles which were obviously designed for purely recreational use, as well as the protective gear worn while using them—each scene with its own brands, styles, and trends. Clothes which unambiguously reveal their wearers as reckless polluters, and make it clear that they're not ashamed of it.

Still today, petrol culture is ubiquitous and multifaceted, from the teenage girl who likes to take her motor scooter out for a ride, to the professional race car driver. But they all have one thing in common: they value their personal comfort, joy, or thrill more highly than an intact natural environment, other people's health, or, in fact, their own.

Engine noise to drown out a guilty conscience

Nowadays, combustion engines are more heavily criticised and decried than they had been in the past few decades. The environmental movement, which first attracted major attention in the 1970s, has been steadily gaining steam until today. Feared ramifications of climate change have become reality one by one, and the forecast looks grim. Blatant cases of pollution are more likely to be called out, especially if they seem gratuitous.

Despite that, even in the age of Fridays for Future and Extinction Rebellion, it doesn't look like petrol culture's popularity is in a noteworthy decline. Walking around the suburbs on weekends, you still hear the revs of gas-powered gardening tools, which are still a popular item at hardware stores. Motorsports are as popular as ever, and clubs are fostering record numbers of young talents. Few of those kids show much interest in the new electric vehicles. Gasoline-driven karts and motorcycles are still what everybody wants to switch over to sooner or later. Likewise for teenagers, the gas-powered scooter is still the real status symbol, despite—or maybe precisely becuase of—the success of electric scooters. And more young people than ever, especially women, are getting their motorcycle licence.

A young woman is suiting up for riding motocross
Petrol culture has long stopped being a male-dominated field. While that should be considered a win as far as gender equality is concerned, what it means for environmental conservation efforts is disastrous, doubling the potential pool of athletes for climate-wrecking motorsports.

It's paradoxical. We know more than ever about the impacts of petrol exhaust fumes on our health, the environment, and global climate. The long-term damage, caused by all the poison we have already pumped into the atmosphere over the past century, is becoming obvious and undeniable. Climate models are predicting downright apocalyptic scenarios for our future, even if we managed to immediately stop all of our emissions. Yet in spite of all that, as a species, we seem to be incapable of kicking our addiction to gasoline.

Hundreds of millions of people continue to indulge in motorised recreation. The excuse of not having known about, or not believing in, the severe environmental impact is no longer credible. In order for them to enjoy doing what they do, they have to consciously and deliberately suppress their guilty conscience. On their dirtbikes and jetskis, with their lawnmowers and chainsaws, among friends on the karting track, they can't risk any involuntary and unexpected thoughts about the environment bubbling up, lest they could spoil the fun. The plumes of exhaust gas, the pungent stench, and the harmful pollutants are collectively ignored and never brought up in conversation. That way, nobody has to think about or admit how inexcusable and unforgivable it really is to simply release all of this toxic waste into the air.

A young motocross rider is revving a two-stroke dirtbike, blowing thick, blue clouds of exhaust fumes into a pristine, lush forest.
Offroad sports are particularly harmful. The exhaust fumes are emitted in the heart of nature, exposing plants and animal habitats to extremely high concentrations of contaminants. (Video)

A species running out of fuel

It's ironic that we use a pinnacle of human intelligence and inventiveness, the internal combustion engine, to destroy our own basis of existence. It shows how difficult it is for the human mind to grasp processes which take longer than its own lifespan. Our brains aren't wired to make decisions which will only pay off far into the future.

Rationally, we understand the severity of the damage caused by air pollution, and know that our environment is already in a dreadful state. We know that we desperately need to reduce our carbon footprint. But these truths are far away from our everyday life and experience. After all, the air outside still seems fresh and crisp, and we can breathe without any problems. Besides, exhaust fumes disperse and waft away so quickly, you can't even see them anymore after a few seconds. So how bad can it really be? Our mind is much better at seeing the immediate benefits, and is instinctively drawn to them: riding a jetski is a lot of fun; it's much more comfortable to take the scooter to university; using the lawn trimmer will save me a bit of time.

A young woman is operating a lawn trimmer and blowing a plume of exhaust gas into the air.
A young woman is operating a lawn trimmer with a two-stroke engine. Despite the tiny, small-bore engine, and the fact that it accomplishes nothing more than rotating a little string, such a device emits as many pollutants as hundreds of cars. (Video w/o sound)

Changes since the discovery of crude oil and the invention of the combustion engine happened way too quickly for our species to adapt to the new circumstances through natural evolution. Our instincts have evolved to ensure humanity's survival, but the dangers are no longer the same. We're scared of large predators, disgusted by potentially poisonous insects, and our taste buds warn us of foods that may be toxic. If our species had had the time to adapt its self-preservation instincts, we might have also felt disgust at the smell of gasoline. Unfortunately, most people seem to actually consider it pleasant.

That's how our species was able to become radically estranged from the nature we originated from, and which we still need to survive. Nowhere is this estrangement more plainly visible than in motorsports. We build infernal machines and fill them with crude oil, a highly toxic substance which we extract from deep within the earth, causing great environmental damage in the process. We then use these machines to burn the oil, causing ear-splitting noise and turning clean air into a deadly gas, which we then simply release back into the surrounding air. All of that just to drive a wheel, because we enjoy going fast.

While doing this, the riders are wearing protective gear which is also made from the toxic crude oil. Even the outfit is contaminating nature, spreading microplastics and oozing carcinogenic softeners, and it won't degrade and decompose for centuries. Clad from head to toe in plastic, the riders aren't even recognisable as natural beings anymore. When they put on their helmets, the last semblance of them as a part of nature disappears.

Suddenly, the pollution they cause seems a little less paradoxical. In their padded, plastic armour, they no longer look like beings who depend on an intact natural environment for survival. They're alien bodies, not living in harmony with nature, but protecting themselves against it. Standing there in a cloud of thick, suffocating, oily exhaust fumes which they themselves caused, it almost looks like that was the air composition they naturally belong and feel most comfortable in.

A group of motocross riders on their dirtbikes from behind, with massive amounts of thick, blue exhaust fumes obscuring most of the view.
Not all followers of petrol culture block out the pollution. Some openly acknowledge it in slightly mischievous ways, playing with their hands in the exhaust stream, or looking back at the fumes. They seem almost proud of the pollution they cause. (Video)

Maybe this outward disguise even helps motorsports athletes silence their guilty conscience and dissociate themselves from their actions. If people can barely discern you as human anymore, let alone recognise you, you have to feel less ashamed for your transgressions. Would the riders feel more shame about desecrating the environment if they had to see their own faces while doing it? If everybody could see that a human being, a specific person, is responsible for the devastation?

Feelings of guilt can also be reduced by committing the evil deed bluntly and out in the open. A person in motocross gear is naturally expected to go riding a dirtbike. They're just fulfilling expectations. Nobody can claim to have been completely taken aback when a figure clad in full racing gear started a loud and polluting engine. People who are bothered by that should just not hang out around people who wear motocross gear, right?

Defying the spirit of the times

Apparently, we can't hope for evolution or our basic instincts to help protect us from ourselves. Gasoline engines are too exciting and too much fun, while the long-term consequences of the pollution they cause seem too abstract. Therefore, the only remaining hope we have to save the environment is by changing our behaviour and educating future generations.

The indications don't look very encouraging. Indeed, we teach our children about the environment and the climate, and emphasise how important it is that we wean ourselves off fossil fuels. At the same time, young generations continue to be introduced and recruited into petrol culture, consciously or not. Kids are enthralled by motorsports, admire the freedom of motorcycle riding, and wait impatiently for their chance to ride or drive as well.

The impressive machines, the cool outfits, the touch of rebelliousness—there are a lot of things to make the world of motors deeply attractive to young people. Against all reason and common sense, many parents grant them the wish of joining it. Away from public roads, motorsports allow children to drive motor vehicles before they're old enough to get a licence. Motorcycle manufacturers build dirtbikes for children as young as 3 years old—with real gasoline engines! Many children are introduced by parents who are themselves active in motorsports. Friends learn about what they do and become jealous; clubs emerge to offer easy introductions and a way to join. A self-reinforcing cycle which funnels more and more children into the world of motorsports.

A young blonde girl wearing motocross pants, boots, and chest protector, next to two dirtbikes and a large, orange gas can.
A young adherent to 'petrol culture'. By the time they turn old enough to drive, and their peers take the wheel of a car for the very first time, those who grew up in this culture may have already burned through thousands of liters of gasoline.

Some children and teenagers seem to have chosen a different path. With movements such as Fridays for Future, young people have shown the will to break this vicious cycle, to honour the environment, to treat and protect it better than the generations before them. But the movement could never win over a majority of young folks, and seems to have already passed its peak.

For children who have been introduced to petrol culture, on the other hand, there's usually no way back. Anyone who has been put on motorcycles from an early age, who has felt the power and freedom, the sensation of twisting the throttle, will want to have fun with motors for the rest of their life. Anyone who has been practicing, since early childhood, a sport in which pungent exhaust fumes are just a completely normalised matter of course, will never see them as a major problem. What they will associate with the smell is not the horrors of climate change, but heartwarming childhood memories.

A group of young motocross riders
For young people indoctrinated into petrol culture, the exhaust fumes they cause, and are exposed to, when practicing their sport have been normalised. Estranged from nature in their plastic protective gear, they represent an extreme antithesis to the climate protestors of their generation.

Accordingly, humans aren't freeing themselves from their addiction to gasoline, but carrying the culture forward through the generations, as long as that's still possible. Thoughtless and irresponsible, we have polluted and poisoned the planet that future generations will inherit. But subliminally, we continue teaching them that the destruction of the environment is a problem still far off in the future, and that it's okay to waste gasoline for fun.

Pandora's box is open. Our sense of reason is powerless against our deeply rooted fascination for combustion engines. To stress the urgency of the problem, some are saying that we need to save the environment for our childrens' sake. But a great number of those children have already decided. They don't want us to deprive them of the fun that we ourselves have had. As of today, the youngest generation itself has long since started polluting, ravaging, and poisoning the planet, and their very own future.

Environmental sins, captured on video

Smoke and mirrors

Ever since reckless pollution started occupying my mind, I have been collecting video footage of it. Apart from the stirring feelings of sorrow and dismay I felt when seeing the debasement of nature in real-time, I also wondered why people would film themselves doing such objectionable things. Is their pride in their passion greater than their sense of shame? Are they deliberately showing off how ruthlessly they treat nature, as a defiant reaction to criticism from "tree huggers"? Or have they become so desensitised that they no longer even notice the pollution?

By now, my collection includes more than 1500 gigabytes of videos and photos. In addition to the exhaust fumes of many kinds of vehicles, powertools, and all types of motorsport, it also documents tree fellings and large-scale deforestation, oil spills and plastic pollution, as well as pictures symbolising petrol culture and humans' alienation from nature.

The archive is a body of evidence and an indictment. Now and in the future, it shall attest to the reckless, irresponsible, senseless, and inconsiderate way in which we humans contaminated and destroyed our environment. The collection is constantly being expanded, catalogued, and in part made publicly accessible. These videos are just a tiny sample.

More footage will continually be documented and linked in the video database. I always collect more recordings bearing witness to humanity's pitiless desecration of our own environment.

If you consider yourself an environmentalist, beware that you may find many of these videos to be unsettling or disturbing. Motorsports events where hundreds of racers, just for their own fun, cloak the countryside in a toxic haze. People refuelling their jetskis and not caring about gasoline spilled into the lake. Children being accustomed to senseless air pollution and taught to participate in it from an early age. Healthy, old trees being cut down by chainsaws, or entire forests being razed to the ground.

Reporting on shameless pollution worldwide

Latest environmental news

Happy New Year 2024!

Happy New Year 2024!

I wish you all a happy and healthy 2024! Read more about my plans for Abgase.org for the new year.

1st Jan 2024
Movie: Gran Turismo (2023)

Movie: Gran Turismo (2023)

Sony Pictures is about to release a feature film based on a true story, following how a successful player of the Gran Turismo racing videogame became a real-world race car driver.

8th Aug 2023
Highly carcinogenic fuel approved by the EPA

Highly carcinogenic fuel approved by the EPA

As the non-profit newsroom Pro Publica reports, the U.S. Environmental Protection Agency (EPA) in spring approved new boat fuel additives by Chevron, whose exhaust fumes are a million times more carcinogenic than guidelines normally allow. Continued exposure to the fumes would statistically cause cancer in nearly 100% of people.

7th Aug 2023

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📣 Have I missed something? If you're aware of any other news, studies, or events related to pollution or environmental destruction, please let me know!

Self-preservation beats environmental preservation

Humans are extremely creative and inventive. This is evident not least in the many ways they have found to pollute, poison, and destroy their environment. We contaminate our breathing air and atmosphere, poison the water and the soil, we deface nature with noise, stink, light, and radiation. While looking for resources, we drill through the Earth, cut down the forests, and wipe out animal species. We produce vast quantities of artificial materials which, once discarded as trash, will taint nature for millennia. We push global climate into an enduring and dangerous imbalance, ultimately threatening even our own survival.

Although we arose from nature, we now seem to represent some absurd opposite to it. Our natural environment is graceful, warm, colourful, pristine, sustainable, and balanced. Wherever we humans leave our traces, we leave behind filth, poison and stench; a cold, bleak, repulsive environment that is hostile to life, and barely manages to recover from our presence.

But even as we figured out what we were causing, we didn't change our behaviour. Today, we know how severely harmful the exhaust fumes of internal combustion engines are. Still, we use more of them than ever before for fun and out of laziness. We normalise engines and exhaust gas in front of our kids, so that the cycle continues. Not even when teenagers at the indoor karting track suffer from nausea, due to the high levels of air pollution, do we bring this leisure activity into question. At most, we complain about the inadequate ventilation system. Our bodies are suffering from all the poison we spew into the environment. But instead of stopping, we developed sophisticated protective gear and equipment, thanks to which we don't even have to be considerate of nature for the sake of our own well-being. Wearing our unnatural protective suits and respirators, we can continue polluting nature without worry, because we're well protected from it.

As a main scope of this website, I'm working on an Encyclopedia of Pollution. I plan to cover not only all of the reckless ways and purposes (or lack thereof) of man-made pollution, but also related topics. The social dynamics which keep propagating petrol culture. The justifications and defiant actions of polluters. The ubiquity of the consequences, as well as the tools and protections we developed to be able to ignore and protect ourselves from them.

About the author

This section is being reworked

In case you've been reading this far, first of all: thank you! I'm glad you're interested in the topic of this site. My name is Daniel, I'm Swiss, in my mid-30s, and the author of these pages. After reading the introduction in the previous sections, you probably assume that I'm a staunch environmentalist, a real tree hugger and eco-warrior, deeply upset and outraged at how humans treat the environment. In some ways, your assumption would be right. But it's only half of the story.

It's true that as a boy, I grew up with a pronounced and deep-seated environmental consciousness, although I'm not sure why. The environment wasn't a major topic at home. Although my parents were no environmentalists, they usually tried to do the right thing. I assume that a much bigger influence was the fact that the topic was ever-present in the media of the late 80s and early 90s. Especially acid rain and dying forest syndrome were discussed a lot. I'm pretty sure it's what got me to develop an interest in environmental protection.

Childrens' magazines and television shows were also regularly running environmental topics, showing pictures of severe environmental damage and explaining what caused it. I remember magazine articles showing photos of clear-cut rainforest, animals who had lost their homes, but also the loggers, cutting into tree trunks with their chainsaws. The authors tried to illustrate how much of the rainforest is being chopped down every day, but the dimensions went beyond what my young mind was able to grasp—even today, I don't think I can really comprehend it. In the ever-popular scale of reference, it was apparently around 50,000 football fields per day in the 1990s.

On TV, I saw pictures of dying forests, closer to home. They explained that the trees were dying because cars were blowing exhaust fumes into the air, which then fell back and seeped into the ground as acid rain. These reports tried to make sure we'd grow up to be environmentally conscious adults, and do a better job at protecting nature than the generation of our parents.

The effort was very effective in my case, the images moved me deeply. Every time I saw such pictures of environmental destruction, I had a lump in my throat. It was an overwhelming roller-coaster of emotions. I was unfathomably sad to see how this beautiful nature was polluted and destroyed. I was furious at the humans who were doing this to nature without showing any remorse. At the same time, I didn't understand how grown-ups were capable of causing this devastation—after all, they must've known just as well as I that we can't survive without a healthy environment. But I also felt an excruciating sense of hopelessness, because I knew how quickly the devastation was progressing and that much of it would, once destroyed, be irrecoverably lost.

I soon fulfilled the stereotype of a tree hugger as much as was possible for a boy of maybe 6 or 7 years of age. I took a vow to myself to never use a gasoline motor for as long as I lived. My persuasive power was strong enough that I was able to convice a few neighbourhood kids to take the same vow (all of them have broken it since). But I was frustrated that there wasn't anything more I could do. A small boy couldn't do anything about the many, grown-up polluters in the world. So I started looking for things that could at least make me feel like I was making a difference.

The author in a Dainese one-piece motorcycle leather suit, and a Shoei helmetOne rather clear memory from those early years is of my "exhaust gas notes". The exhaust pipes of cars and motorcycles were, apart from the occasional tree being cut down, the only kind of pollution I was directly confronted with in my small suburbian childhood life. I started paying close attention to cars driving by, checking to see if visible smoke was coming out of their tailpipes. I saw this as a clear sign that a car was causing more pollution than the others. On little slips of paper, I took notes of which cars puffed out little, a lot, or especially much exhaust gas. I don't remember what I thought that would achieve, or what I planned on doing with the information. But I guess it made me feel like I was collecting evidence against polluters.

Unfortunately, nobody else seemed to share my grave concern for the environment. Everybody was driving cars, and nobody seemed to pay any attention to the exhaust fumes. That made me feel even more helpless. The topic was a very emotional one to me, and it occupied my mind pretty much every day. Whenever I saw exhaust fumes somewhere, I just couldn't look away. I had to watch intently, so that at least one person could attest to what had happened. When I heard the engine of a moped, I'd try to find it so I could maybe get a glimpse of the exhaust fumes and condemn the rider in my mind. If I heard the sound of chainsaws in the distance, I'd scan the treetops in the village and the forests on the horizon, trying to see if somewhere, a tree would topple over and fall.

It was like collecting evidence again, but it also felt somewhat comforting. Although I couldn't prevent a patch of air from being contaminated, or a tree from being felled and lost forever, at least I was present in that moment. I had witnessed it and felt the sadness, the anger, and frustration. That made the destruction feel a tiny bit less senseless. I would remember and be able to tell others about it. Car drivers couldn't pollute the air unchecked, because somebody caught them doing it. The tree wasn't just crashing down without anybody caring. I gave it back some dignity by sharing the pain during its last moments, and aching for it after it was gone.

But at this time, I also started uncovering the other side of my complex relationship with pollution. Back then, I discovered some new bodily sensations and started exploring them. My mind almost immediately associated this with my obsession for exhaust gas and tree fellings. For many years, I puzzled over the question of how this connection came about. But it might be very simple: exhaust fumes were on my mind almost constantly, so I was probably also thinking about them while experiencing those new sensations. Conditioning took care of the rest. I thought that those nice feelings had something to do with my thoughts about pollution, and because it felt so nice, I naturally started to think about pollution again the next time.

These new feelings didn't change anything about my environmentally conscious attitude, but they chipped away at my self-image. How could it be that something so reprehensible, something I was disgusted by and hated with a passion, enabled such wonderful sensations at the same time? Of course, I still couldn't understand what those feelings were in the first place. But I noticed that because of them, I started to feel new emotions when watching the environment being polluted. In addition to my usual sadness, indignation, and helplessness, I now also felt temptation, craving, and excitement. It was incredibly confusing to have such contradictory feelings about the same thing.

This inner conflict also led to the theory that my reaction might have been a psychological coping mechanism. Humanity's reckless behaviour made me incredibly sad, but I couldn't do anything to stop it. Maybe my paradoxical response was a way for me to regain a feeling of control. I was frustrated that I was so helpless against man-made pollution, but as long as I also found desire and pleasure in it, things were still somewhat going my way. I wasn't just at the mercy of having to watch the desecration of the environment – part of me actually wanted to see it happen.

The things I saw happen still hurt me deeply. I still wished that I could protect the environment. But I had also started to like the thrill I now felt whenever I saw such heartbreaking incidents. I was eager to see the most devastating scenes of pollution to get my "kick". Soon, I was almost only interested in the pitch-black, sooty exhaust fumes of diesel engines and, above all others, the oily fumes of two-stroke engines, such as those in scooters and enduro dirtbikes. I had learned that for once, looks weren't deceiving: the pungent, sickly-blue, thick exhaust fumes of a single two-stroke were indeed more polluting and poisonous than those of hundreds of cars! That thought excited me. Because the allure was bigger the worse the pollution was, I started looking for two-strokes above all others.

When I was scanning the treetops again, looking for where the noise of chainsaws was coming from, I caught myself almost hoping to see a tree fall. Of course I had always hoped that, in case a tree was truly being felled, I wouldn't miss seeing the moment it happened. But now, I caught myself being downright disappointed if it turned out that none were being cut down at all. When I saw a scooter at the intersection and fixed my eyes on the little exhaust pipe, I genuinely hoped for it to blow out a thick, blue plume. I even hoped that the rider would unnecessarily rev their engine while waiting for the green light, so that I could watch and get upset about even more exhaust fumes, while berating the rider in my mind. I wanted to see the most appalling pollution possible so that I could commit it to memory and, later at home, enjoy myself while recalling it.

The author in a kart racing suitMoments like the pointless revving at a red light also made me discover that an incident was more thrilling to me the more senseless I thought the pollution was. My excitement came directly from my outrage, and it was easier to be appalled by someone if they were polluting unnecessarily. A smoking exhaust pipe is less outrageous, and therefore also less titillating, if it belong to a bus that is simply taking passengers from A to B. It affected me much more deeply if I observed two teenagers sitting on mopeds, endlessly gossiping in front of school, while just leaving their engines running all the time. In the same way, it wasn't as stirring to see workers cut down an old, visibly sick tree, as it was to see them fell one that looked healthy and majestic. Even better if the tree wasn't being cut down for a new building, but apparently because some neighbour wanted a better view from their window.

The very things that made my inner tree hugger especially sad and angry, made these other feelings all the more intense and exciting. That's why I kept looking for more shocking incidents of pollution all the time, with even more severe consequences, and even more reckless polluters. This dynamic explains my ambivalent relation with pollution and environmental protection to this day.

It also explains my specific obsession with motorsports such as motocross and karting. Nowhere else are there dirtier engines being used more pointlessly. With their two-stroke engines, every single athlete is causing as much pollution as a thousand gas-powered cars, the pollution is being caused for absolutely no useful purpose, oftentimes in the middle of nature, nobody wastes a single thought on the environment, and nobody is ashamed of their wastefulness—in fact, they're proudly putting it on display with their racing gear. It's the ultimate nightmare of every environmentalist, like my one side, and therefore the greatest thrill for my other, "darker" side.

As a teenager, I was incredibly anxious that someone could find out about my weird thoughts and feeling about exhaust fumes. To prevent that, I pretended for a long time to be utterly disinterested in anything even remotely related to motors or environmental protection. My disinterest was so exaggerated that, in hindsight, it might have made me all the more suspicious!

Ironically, that's why I was also one of the few students who never owned a moped or scooter. I can't imagine the mind-blowing rush it would've been, had I owned and been able to use a two-stroke of my own as a teenager. My strong environmental qualms against running the engine even for a second would've clashed against an overwhelming temptation. Despite my conscience, I was always curious how it felt to actually run an engine, curious if it would help me understand how people, some of them my friends, were able to do such an unforgivable thing and simply not care about the resulting pollution.

However, I didn't stay entirely passive towards my secret obsession. I spent more time with classmates who had their own scooter, so that every now and then, I'd get to smell the exhaust fumes when they were driving off. I often took a detour, walking behind the building of a local indoor karting track, where a large air vent was blowing out the air from inside, thick with the smell of exhaust fumes, and releasing it into the surroundings. Still, I wasn't able to actually visit the track myself due to my fear that someone could discover the nature of my excitement about it. At around 12 years old, I bought a used kart racing suit and almost couldn't process the sight of myself wearing it, looking just like one of those evil polluters.

Roughly around that time, I caved in to the final temptation and tried to start a gasoline engine myself for the first time. Alone at home on a weekend, I grabbed my dad's two-stroke string trimmer and decided to try it out. The trimmer had always been in the house, and as a young boy I hated it for the monstrous fumes it was producing. Still, it took many years until I got to the point of wanting to start it up myself. My qualms of conscience had always been much stronger than my curiosity, and there was the vow I had made to myself. Even if I had done it just to see how it felt, and in an effort to better understand polluters, the fumes it would produce would be real and just as devastating, so it was out of the question. I don't think I ever even considered it before I started approaching my teenage years and the urge finally became too strong.

That day, nervous to the point that I was shaking all over, I managed, after many attempts, to properly pull the cord and start the engine. I remember how shocked I was at the sudden noise, but also at the thought that I had finally broken my childhood promise. I watched how little blue clouds were streaming out of the tiny exhaust outlet, and made myself realise that this was it: I was actually polluting the environment, out of my own free will, with real, noxious, entirely pointless exhaust fumes, and I was fully responsible for it. I let the trimmer putter on for about a minute, titillated by the thought that I could stop the pollution at any moment, but decided to let it go on. Then I flipped the kill switch and felt my heart beat in my throat. I had crossed the last boundary.

Throughout all of my childhood and half of my teenage years, I was sure that I must be the only person in the world with these bizarre thoughts, fondnesses, and urges. Over the years, I've been glad to find out that this was far from the truth. While looking for pictures of exhaust gas on the World Wide Web, I soon found like-minded people online. Since then, I've had personal conversations and interesting discussions with many of them, from around the world. Although even among us, nobody can really explain these penchants, it's fascinating to speculate, discuss theories, and swap experiences. This website is another way for me to continue some of those thoughts and discussions. Maybe this text even resolved a bit of the mystery for uninitiated visitors—to the extent that someone not sharing these tendencies could ever hope to relate, at least. I tried my best!

Above all, however, I hope that I will continue to get e-mails from "newbies". Ever since I started my first website on the topic, I've been regularly contacted by people who were in the same situation as younger me, confused and maybe embarrassed about their feelings, and sure that nobody else would understand. One of my main goals in running this site is to let those people know that they're far from alone in this, that there are many like-minded individuals out there who share and understand these strange feelings, and that they can meet and talk to them if they want to. If you're one of them: I'd love to hear your story!

Where motors and exhaust fumes are protected and under conservation

Welcome to the Petrol Preserve

Needless air pollution is politically incorrect and socially stigmatised, so people who have a thing for it tend to keep it a secret. Here in the Petrol Preserve, however, you can feel free to indulge in the cravings and pleasures to your heart's content. I hope that these pages offer something for every visitor, regardless of their opinions on the topic.

If you're new here, but recognise yourself in some of what you've read so far, then you might be interested in my further thoughts and theories on the specific aspects, or the retelling of my own story. Those articles might also help curious or bewildered outsiders get a better insight. For all kindred spirits, the various sections of course also contain growing selections of appealing photos and videos from the wide world of recreational pollution.

Discover ways to contribute to pointless pollution

Head Out and Rev Up!

If these topics sound exciting to you, maybe you're itching to do more than just read about them. Looking at pictures and videos of senseless and careless air pollution is nice, but as the user's manual of every gas-powered device urgently warns: exhaust fumes belong outside, in the open air!

The following sections offer a few ideas and recommendations. Chat with like-minded people, visit places and events of reckless pollution, or rev up an engine of your very own. There are suggestions for everybody. Nobody should feel that they're unable to have some fun with exhaust fumes because they're still too young, live in an inconvenient place, or don't have the money for it. There's always a way!